confused

lfmor · 09-30-2007, 01:06 AM

Hey everyone! I'm new to the site and I'd just like to say I'm so glad to know there is something out there for people like me and that there are more people who are dealing with the same issues that I deal with. I guess I'm just going to tell my story...hopefully I'll feel better getting it out and maybe some people will have some advice as to what I should do.
Ok....Well almost 3 years ago I met my hb, I'll call him Chris, (we have the same dad) for the first time ever. I really never had any contact with that side of the family and had called my step-dad "Daddy" for my entire life, ever since I could say dad. My hb is 4 years older than me and when I first met him I thought he was the greatest person ever...I looked up to him, he had never had a dad either and had always called someone else his dad....until he was 12 he never even knew he had another family. So anyways, we connected really well and were able to confide in each other about the problems we had had with our real dad and just life in general. About two months after we had known each other, it happened, and from then on we were basically inseparable. I loved him more than anything, and I know he felt the same way.
We have been together now for almost 3 years and things have been so hard for us, but we have remained strong....After I graduated school we moved across the country far away from my family because they hate him so much. They can't stand the thought of what is going on. Well in March I got pregnant, I hid it from my family until school was over and then we left. In July, I made a trip home to tell my mom what was going on exactly and wanted to get the rest of my things from home. Once she found out she went crazy and threatened to have both of us put in jail and that if I had the baby she would make sure it would be taken by CPS. I couldn't bare the though of my child being taken from me or the person I love to go to jail. Please don't judge, but I ended up having an abortion. It was the worst mistake I have ever made in my entire life. I am so depressed about the way my life is turning out....I'm still not with Chris and am now in school trying to make it through this. My family figured out what was going on between us and they hate him more than words can describe. I want to be with him and I know it is weird, but we don't even feel like we are related, ya know? The person who connects us has never played a role in our lives. We don't consider him to be our dad. I don't feel like it's wrong even though i know it is. I want to be back with him but now he has been seeing other girls and it is breaking my heart. Is this a sign that we should stop, and if we should how do I go about doing it? I'm already hurt enough about my baby and not being with him during these times and all I want to do is be back with him....Is this wrong? I don't know, but I do know that I feel like I can't be without him or my life will be so incomplete. Thanks for taking the time to read this and hopefully for the people going through the same things that I am will be able to make it though this.

lfmor · 09-30-2007, 02:31 AM

Ok...so I've been reading more threads and thought I'd give a little more info on the two of us...Neither of us were in relationships when it happened, I was fairly young still, and he had been in and out of a bad relationship which has totally ended. Neither of us have any children.

I also have a couple of questions....
-I had no idea about GSA when this occurred, and basically could not help the feelings I had. I now know why I had these feelings (GSA) and was wondering if I should try to overcome then even though I am so much in love. My heart belongs to him and I can't see myself without him, but should we try to stop?

sislovesbro · 10-01-2007, 03:38 PM

If you both are single, there are no children to be concerned about, and your feelings are mutual - go for it. Why deny yourself? I think you have to be reasonable in the sense that others close to you may have difficulty accepting what you are doing. But, if you both care deeply for each other, love each other, then I say give it a try. Life is short, and experiencing love is the most precious gift ever.

iwannakissyew · 10-27-2007, 04:03 PM

Oh girl, I hope you never say that again! If you two want to be together, then everyone else just needs to let you be. I've come to that conclusion. What I've noticed is that our stories have so many simularities! My half-brother is also 4 years older than me, his family HATES me with a passion.. blahblahblah.. the only problem with our situation is what I told you in the message, and there is no way we can move out or anything since we're both so young. He's also a ward of the state until 1- he graduates or 2- he turns 21. So he's planning on graduating in Jan 28th.

Another few random facts-
- Both my brother and I were born on August 29th.
- He was born at 5:29am; I was born at 5:31am. weird, huh?
- His parents lie to us all the time.. so what if he's not even 19?

09-30-2007, 01:06 AM	#1
lfmor Junior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: united states Posts: 12	confused Hey everyone! I'm new to the site and I'd just like to say I'm so glad to know there is something out there for people like me and that there are more people who are dealing with the same issues that I deal with. I guess I'm just going to tell my story...hopefully I'll feel better getting it out and maybe some people will have some advice as to what I should do. Ok....Well almost 3 years ago I met my hb, I'll call him Chris, (we have the same dad) for the first time ever. I really never had any contact with that side of the family and had called my step-dad "Daddy" for my entire life, ever since I could say dad. My hb is 4 years older than me and when I first met him I thought he was the greatest person ever...I looked up to him, he had never had a dad either and had always called someone else his dad....until he was 12 he never even knew he had another family. So anyways, we connected really well and were able to confide in each other about the problems we had had with our real dad and just life in general. About two months after we had known each other, it happened, and from then on we were basically inseparable. I loved him more than anything, and I know he felt the same way. We have been together now for almost 3 years and things have been so hard for us, but we have remained strong....After I graduated school we moved across the country far away from my family because they hate him so much. They can't stand the thought of what is going on. Well in March I got pregnant, I hid it from my family until school was over and then we left. In July, I made a trip home to tell my mom what was going on exactly and wanted to get the rest of my things from home. Once she found out she went crazy and threatened to have both of us put in jail and that if I had the baby she would make sure it would be taken by CPS. I couldn't bare the though of my child being taken from me or the person I love to go to jail. Please don't judge, but I ended up having an abortion. It was the worst mistake I have ever made in my entire life. I am so depressed about the way my life is turning out....I'm still not with Chris and am now in school trying to make it through this. My family figured out what was going on between us and they hate him more than words can describe. I want to be with him and I know it is weird, but we don't even feel like we are related, ya know? The person who connects us has never played a role in our lives. We don't consider him to be our dad. I don't feel like it's wrong even though i know it is. I want to be back with him but now he has been seeing other girls and it is breaking my heart. Is this a sign that we should stop, and if we should how do I go about doing it? I'm already hurt enough about my baby and not being with him during these times and all I want to do is be back with him....Is this wrong? I don't know, but I do know that I feel like I can't be without him or my life will be so incomplete. Thanks for taking the time to read this and hopefully for the people going through the same things that I am will be able to make it though this. __________________ lfmor

09-30-2007, 02:31 AM	#2
lfmor Junior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: united states Posts: 12	Ok...so I've been reading more threads and thought I'd give a little more info on the two of us...Neither of us were in relationships when it happened, I was fairly young still, and he had been in and out of a bad relationship which has totally ended. Neither of us have any children. I also have a couple of questions.... -I had no idea about GSA when this occurred, and basically could not help the feelings I had. I now know why I had these feelings (GSA) and was wondering if I should try to overcome then even though I am so much in love. My heart belongs to him and I can't see myself without him, but should we try to stop? __________________ lfmor

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10-01-2007, 03:38 PM	#3
sislovesbro Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Oregon Posts: 11	If you both are single, there are no children to be concerned about, and your feelings are mutual - go for it. Why deny yourself? I think you have to be reasonable in the sense that others close to you may have difficulty accepting what you are doing. But, if you both care deeply for each other, love each other, then I say give it a try. Life is short, and experiencing love is the most precious gift ever.

10-27-2007, 04:03 PM	#4
iwannakissyew Junior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 6	Oh girl, I hope you never say that again! If you two want to be together, then everyone else just needs to let you be. I've come to that conclusion. What I've noticed is that our stories have so many simularities! My half-brother is also 4 years older than me, his family HATES me with a passion.. blahblahblah.. the only problem with our situation is what I told you in the message, and there is no way we can move out or anything since we're both so young. He's also a ward of the state until 1- he graduates or 2- he turns 21. So he's planning on graduating in Jan 28th. Another few random facts- - Both my brother and I were born on August 29th. - He was born at 5:29am; I was born at 5:31am. weird, huh? - His parents lie to us all the time.. so what if he's not even 19?