Is this GSA or something else

[stevie]

I think your plan makes sense, because it will allow you to a) find out for sure what SHE is feeling/thinking--so you can deal with whatever is going on between you from a place of reality and not speculation; and b) come to your decision more thoughtfully and without, as you say, being able to act impulsively. No matter how your sister is looking at the situation, it will also be considerate to help her understand why you backed off so much. I know I would appreciate that from my brother! (And actually, I need to take my own advice and find a way to do exactly the same in my situation with him as what you're doing!)

[WaterClearerThanWater]

we spoke - it went, well it went. it was awkward to say the least. She did not admit to anything. She was quite quiet all the way through. She didn't do much talking on her end at all. I felt like I put myself out there pretty far and I got nothing in return. Not even acknowledgement. No indication of anything from her other than, I don't know what to say.

Was I so wrong? Maybe she was not feeling what I was. Maybe I'm imagining the whole thing. I told her I found a website and that I'd like her to look at this place. I didn't even get acknowledgement of that, whether she'd take a look or not. She did not ask for the URL. I haven't sent it yet. She didn't really comment at all. I was starting to feel desperate so I stopped talking. I just said I wanted her to know I was having conflicting feelings about her. I did not ask, "Are you having the same kind of feelings?" I didn't accuse her of sending mixed signals.

She must think I'm a sicko.

I'm so confused. I said she touched me when we were together which wasn't too brother/sister like. Could I be wrong about this? I mean, she stroked my inner thigh when we were sitting and left her hand there - almost touching... so how is that? And the intense way she always looked at me. I'm not that inexperienced that I don't know the difference between a family touch and something you save for more intimate people. And the intense hugs. She practically wrapped her legs around me and clung on. She always kissed me hello & goodbye on the lips and not some family peck! I know the difference!

So, I don't know what's going on. I think I've made a big mistake. What if she tells other people? What if she tells other relatives? Did I read this so wrong? I can't say I've noticed how she hugs and kisses other relatives. I wasn't paying attention.

So, is there someone out there that has had this go badly?

She ended our phone call, which was pretty one sided with a rather hushed voice saying, "I don't know what to say to you." She didn't say, "I'll call you back." She didn't say, "That explains things." She didn't say, "I feel something too." She didn't say anything. I just said, "Okay. I wanted you to know." and then we ended up hanging up after "bye".

So.... what do I do next? Do I leave it and not say anything? Should I go see her? I'm thinking I want to get this out of the way before we meet in a group setting. Should I have had her swear to strict confidence? I just don't know her as well as I should so I don't know if she'd tell anyone.

Should I say anything next I call her or pretend everything is fine? I feel so stupid. This just feels like a big mistake. I keep telling myself its not like I'm really loosing anything at all but what if she tells others?

Please help. Should I say anything to anyone else? I don't even know who she might tell. I don't know her friends or which relatives she's close with other than an aunt. But she's ancient. What can I do to minimzie damage?

Should I delete my threads here and then send her a link in an email? Has anyone else had this happen? What happened?

[stevie]

Water -- I sent you a PM.

stevie

[Victor]

Do nothing more....let it sink in. Many of us find it awkward to admit that we have these incestuous feelings....at first. Keep your cool. Don't try to act any different than before. Give her the space and time to come to terms with her own feelings.

But you do have to face the fact that this doesn't happen to everyone.... She may well not have the same feelings for you that you have for her, inspite of what you think you experienced. You can't make her have GSA for you, so you will just have to accept that outcome, if it comes and do the best you can with someone else. You will get over it. But it takes accepting the reality of that outcome to do it. If you only dwell on what you wish would be and not on what's real, you will get stuck in the fantasy of that desire and lose out on the reality that is life.

[DAD48]

Victor Is No Doctor(fake) Victor Doesn't Even Have Kids Or Brothers Or Sisters(fake),why Is He Even Here,he Tells Me He Runs This Site,he Is So....cruel And Rude,no Doctor Would Talk To Another Human Beings The Way He Does,please Get Rid Of Him Asap!

[Victor]

Originally Posted by DAD48

Victor Is No Doctor(fake) Victor Doesn't Even Have Kids Or Brothers Or Sisters(fake),why Is He Even Here,he Tells Me He Runs This Site,he Is So....cruel And Rude,no Doctor Would Talk To Another Human Beings The Way He Does,please Get Rid Of Him Asap!

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Victor]

Originally Posted by DAD48

Victor Is No Doctor(fake)

Never claimed to be a "doctor" to these people, DAD. You are aware, however, that the word "doctor" does not necessarily mean "medical doctor" or "psychologist" or "psychaitrist"? A doctor is anyone with a doctorate degree, be it in medicine, engineering, physics, law, criminology, religion or any of a thousand other fields.

Originally Posted by DAD48

Victor Doesn't Even Have Kids Or Brothers Or Sisters(fake)

Well, to be honest, I have a brother (43) and two sisters (46/49), two daughters (30/32), one step daughter (34), one step son (33) and 5 grandchildren, and I also have a mother and father (74/75 and living). I did an interview with Bella Magazine with my eldest daughter (32) which was published in Bella Magazine in the UK, in their October 16th issue (for those in the UK who read Bella, and yes, those were our pictures in the article) and my daughter and I just finished an interveiw with a producer with the History Channel/Fox Inc which will be coming out this spring. So this lie of yours will very soon be proven to be what it is.

Originally Posted by DAD48

why Is He Even Here,

I'm here because I have GSA for my daughter, who has it for me. Why are YOU here....to cause trouble? To brag? To titilate and exite? To seek medical advice? To try to end the confusion in your mind over these feelings by talking to others who share your unusual situation?

Originally Posted by DAD48

he Tells Me He Runs This Site,

I said no such thing. I simply informed you that I was reporting your PMs to me to the site administrators. Either you're an idoit and really can't understand what you read, or you're smart and trying to cause trouble with that lie. Barb Gonyo, site owner, knows better than that, DAD. She's read our earlier PM exchange and called me about an hour ago to talk about you and our exchange. You might want to avoid lying, especially where it can be proven to be so. I certainly don't appreciate liars, and I'm sure others here don't.

Originally Posted by DAD48

he Is So....cruel And Rude,no Doctor Would Talk To Another Human Beings The Way He Does,

I'm just someone who has learned from his own experience with GSA and the research I've done, giving advice to those who want it and need it. I'm cruel and rude only to those who have earned that kind of response from me.

Originally Posted by DAD48

please Get Rid Of Him Asap!

Folks....what DAD is upset about is that earlier today he wrote me a PM asking me point blank if "I screwed my daughter." My first response was polite but short letting him know that his blunt and inappropriate question wasn't appreciated (I was mortified by the impropriety of his question). Then he called me an "ahole", and I cut loose into him as by now I was convinced he was one of those perverts we were talking about earlier today (I sent Barb the exchange). He may not be a perv, but he has the social grace of an ox. He has GSA for his daughter who he is convinced he must have sex with. He needs our help and our understanding....not just for his lack of commonsense and compassion for others, but for his feelings of GSA which he barely understands the nature of.

Clearly, there is nothing I can offer him at this point that he is willing to take as advice, so I leave him in your hands. I'll keep trying to get through...