Half Brother Anxiety - Page 2

BarbGonyo · 06-02-2006, 11:03 AM

Hello again,

Oh, how many times I've heard, I wish this would be over with because this is the hard part and we can move on to the next step of never seeing each other again or becoming friends etc.

Believe me my friend you are not in the hardest stage of a reunion but the easiest stage. I'm sure the anxiety is torture but it is only the first step. It is the step that erases the curiosity of what this other person is like and if we will like each other or hate each other.

Think back on any relationship you have ever had. First you have a desire to meet someone, sometimes it is anyone. Then you meet, then you get to know each other slowly.... hopefully. Then you compare sameness and differences.

Any good relationship worth keeping takes time and a lot of work. I'm sure we all put on our best side when we first meet a new person. (Unless we have a grudge and want to control the relationship and have it vanish).

In time we become more natural with each other and begin to show our warts as the saying goes.

It isn't too different from marriage. We meet, we court, we love, we struggle, we fight, we either stay together or divorce. We say opposites attract. This is generally true but they also don't always have an easy life together. Sometimes it is the sameness in a relationship that makes for a long term relationship and in some cases it is the sameness that gives us problems with GSA. We see ourselves in these people and have an ego trip of liking ourselves through this other person. This too can be tricky as sometimes we see what we don't like about ourselves in the other person...That's life.

As I've said many times it is very complicated.

With GSA it is usually not same sex people but can be. It is the need to be totally intimate. I write about this in my book. When a person is unable to give of him/herself intimately unless it is through sex, then problems become GSA problems.

Most people can be loving and giving without being sexual even if they have sexual feelings for the other person. Those usually are the relationships that last and take on the flavor of what they are: parent/child, siblings/ friends.

I do like that fact that you are thinking this out and talking about it so that you have a picture of not only the future but of the past that is bringing you together.

I wish you a successful reunion and a wonderful relationship with the past forgotten between you two. This will take work.

Please continue to write as you will help others also in your posts.

Barb Gonyo

06-02-2006, 11:03 AM	#11
BarbGonyo Administrator Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 291	meeting brother Hello again, Oh, how many times I've heard, I wish this would be over with because this is the hard part and we can move on to the next step of never seeing each other again or becoming friends etc. Believe me my friend you are not in the hardest stage of a reunion but the easiest stage. I'm sure the anxiety is torture but it is only the first step. It is the step that erases the curiosity of what this other person is like and if we will like each other or hate each other. Think back on any relationship you have ever had. First you have a desire to meet someone, sometimes it is anyone. Then you meet, then you get to know each other slowly.... hopefully. Then you compare sameness and differences. Any good relationship worth keeping takes time and a lot of work. I'm sure we all put on our best side when we first meet a new person. (Unless we have a grudge and want to control the relationship and have it vanish). In time we become more natural with each other and begin to show our warts as the saying goes. It isn't too different from marriage. We meet, we court, we love, we struggle, we fight, we either stay together or divorce. We say opposites attract. This is generally true but they also don't always have an easy life together. Sometimes it is the sameness in a relationship that makes for a long term relationship and in some cases it is the sameness that gives us problems with GSA. We see ourselves in these people and have an ego trip of liking ourselves through this other person. This too can be tricky as sometimes we see what we don't like about ourselves in the other person...That's life. As I've said many times it is very complicated. With GSA it is usually not same sex people but can be. It is the need to be totally intimate. I write about this in my book. When a person is unable to give of him/herself intimately unless it is through sex, then problems become GSA problems. Most people can be loving and giving without being sexual even if they have sexual feelings for the other person. Those usually are the relationships that last and take on the flavor of what they are: parent/child, siblings/ friends. I do like that fact that you are thinking this out and talking about it so that you have a picture of not only the future but of the past that is bringing you together. I wish you a successful reunion and a wonderful relationship with the past forgotten between you two. This will take work. Please continue to write as you will help others also in your posts. Barb Gonyo __________________ Barbara is the author of "I'm His Mother,but He's Not My Son" (formerly titled "The Forbidden Love, GSA". In the paper back edition of Forbidden Love, there are a total of 20 books left in that form. "The Forbidden Love Genetic Sexual Attraction is $15.00 plus postage and handling. Postage varies in places. In the U.S. postage comes to $2.31 Austrailia Fast Slower $8.40 one week $4.05- 4 weeks New I'm His Mother, but, He's Not My Son" will now be available electronically for your convience. The price is $15.00 check made out to Barbara Gonyo 906 Ioka Mt. Prospect, IL 60056 Upon receiving the order you will be given instructions on how to obtain the book. I hope this will be helpful to all of you who were having trouble getting the book. Barb Gonyo

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