Still Happy

luvsbubby · 08-30-2007, 07:53 PM

Hi everyone
I just wanted to check in and see how things were going here. I see that there are a few new people..by the way..I was featured on the Primetime ABC program with Barb..which was re-aired last week. It is nice to see people actually doing some work here with the essays and surveys. I do want to point out for those who did not see the show or have not read my(our) story, that you can be happy in GSA relationships. J and I have been together for 8 years and we are still very happy. Our unhappy moments had occured only when the relationship was disturbed by outside interferences. Pressures from family members and a few friends that thought we shouldnt be together had eventually taken a toll on us as we did give in briefly. Through the process we had realized that in the end we could only see each other there in the big long term picture. We decided that we would get passed the interferences and live for our love. Which we did..and bc of the intense committment to each other we survived the heartbreaks that had occured. Grateful now, we are much happier than we ever have been, and we intend to spend the rest of our lives together as a husband and wife. We know that we are extremely lucky to have received this gift of love from God,
and we accpet this gift and treasure it with all of our being. I also know that GSA can hurt and destroy many people out there...but that happens just the same with non related couples. In comparison, non related couples have much more struggles than related couples. My point is that I hope that if you want it bad enough you will fight for it and after you have won it..you will hold on for what you love. Bc what you love always gets you in the end.This GSA thing you have to fight harder..but the rewards are greater also. Good Luck to you all and you are in our prayers. I will check back.
Luvsbubby

Victor · 08-30-2007, 08:12 PM

It's good to know that living with GSA can have a happy ending. Thanks for that. And thanks for letting your story go public. You have helped pave the way for others. My daughter and I are trying to follow your lead by telling ours.

Again, thanks.

Vic

luvsbubby · 09-07-2007, 07:40 AM

Victor
Please be careful..there are some people who would rather see us burn in hell..it is twice as bad for parent/child. People have a different view when it comes to parent/child..and it is worse on this type of couple as you may have seen that on the abc site. People are always going to say the same thing to you and that is *but you're the parent you should know better* to them its about the traditional parent/child relationship, not about GSA, which is very hard for people to wrap their heads around. I want you to post your opinion(and support everything thats going on) but I dont think you should bring out your relationship right now. I just dont want to see you hurt or jailed. What we are doing is very dangerous right now. Until the laws change..we could get in serious trouble. All it takes is one journalist, law enforcement, or judge to see these issues and want a story that lasts for a few years in litigation to further their carreer. In the meantime we would be fighting for our freedom to love the person of our choice. Please be careful and send your daughter our thoughts, love and prayers.
Luvsbubby

liltimetothink · 09-08-2007, 03:10 AM

Luvsbubby is right. When the situation concerns a parent/child situation, the parent will be looked at as having a better grip on the situation, and have enough sense to deter the situation from becoming a more intimate one. Brother/sister relationships are a more tolerant situation because society views the two participants on equal footing "so to speak". At least that's what I believe.

cap · 09-08-2007, 01:59 PM

I Hate GSA

Victor · 09-08-2007, 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by liltimetothink

Luvsbubby is right. When the situation concerns a parent/child situation, the parent will be looked at as having a better grip on the situation, and have enough sense to deter the situation from becoming a more intimate one. Brother/sister relationships are a more tolerant situation because society views the two participants on equal footing "so to speak". At least that's what I believe.

Both of you keep in mind here that my daughter and I have NOT engaged in a sexual relationship. Only the act of intercourse (or contact with genetals) with your close relative is prohibit by law. We are actually complicating our situation to give us less oportunity to act on our feelings by putting more people around us. It is my hope that over time we will cause the Westermarck effect imprinting that will free us from the feelings of GSA, but neither of us, or the experts, know how long that may take. Also be ware that our identities are being guarded, and that the rags that are carrying our story are outside of our country, and are not available in print on-line.

The worse that can happen is that I get chastized for what I feel. My defense is that it is better to be honest about one's feeling than to be intolerant and a gossip. I 'm not running for political office, here. And I might add that my name is NOT on my daughter's birth certificate. In fact, another man's name is. "Legally" she is NOT my daughter until someone corrects that record. And the courts are more concerned with legalities than actualities.

Believe me when I say that we'll be fine.

Victor · 09-08-2007, 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cap

Just my 2 cents and I don't mean to offend any father/daughter couples, just throwing the slightest bit of suggestion that if a legal case went forward and gained national attention, and the case was a 40 year old father sleeping with his 16 or 17 year old daughter - GSA will be forever looked at as child abuse and incest. IMO the thought of a father sleeping with his daughter would really bring out the Elliot Stabler (Law & Order charicter FYI) in most people.

Rest assured...my daughter is in her 30's and I am in my 50's.

cap · 09-08-2007, 06:54 PM

I Hate GSA

Victor · 09-08-2007, 10:51 PM

Parents are already "grown up" so what then keeps them from being attracted to their children? I have two other daughters, who I raised, for whom I feel no such attraction. One of them looks verymuch like this one. So what's the difference? Why am I so attracted to the one but not the other? Westermarck. Spend enough time with someone in a non-sexual relationship and they become imprinted on your psyche as a non-sexual being. I have heard though that it takes about 6 years for the Westermarck effect to kick in. So it will probably take us six years of resisiting one another until our feelings finally subside. This is not, however, something you can do by separation. You have to live in close proximity to the person to effect the imprinting.

Look, if it works it will be good news for those who suffer unrequited GSA, or those like me who just can't act on it or risk becoming the lowest scum on the planet. If not, I don't know what I'm going to do. But at least, right now, I'm trying to do something about it.

cap · 09-09-2007, 05:49 AM

I Hate GSA

08-30-2007, 07:53 PM	#1
luvsbubby Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: ohio Posts: 88	Still Happy Hi everyone I just wanted to check in and see how things were going here. I see that there are a few new people..by the way..I was featured on the Primetime ABC program with Barb..which was re-aired last week. It is nice to see people actually doing some work here with the essays and surveys. I do want to point out for those who did not see the show or have not read my(our) story, that you can be happy in GSA relationships. J and I have been together for 8 years and we are still very happy. Our unhappy moments had occured only when the relationship was disturbed by outside interferences. Pressures from family members and a few friends that thought we shouldnt be together had eventually taken a toll on us as we did give in briefly. Through the process we had realized that in the end we could only see each other there in the big long term picture. We decided that we would get passed the interferences and live for our love. Which we did..and bc of the intense committment to each other we survived the heartbreaks that had occured. Grateful now, we are much happier than we ever have been, and we intend to spend the rest of our lives together as a husband and wife. We know that we are extremely lucky to have received this gift of love from God, and we accpet this gift and treasure it with all of our being. I also know that GSA can hurt and destroy many people out there...but that happens just the same with non related couples. In comparison, non related couples have much more struggles than related couples. My point is that I hope that if you want it bad enough you will fight for it and after you have won it..you will hold on for what you love. Bc what you love always gets you in the end.This GSA thing you have to fight harder..but the rewards are greater also. Good Luck to you all and you are in our prayers. I will check back. Luvsbubby

09-08-2007, 01:59 PM	#5
cap Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Plymouth, MA Posts: 50	brother/sis vs. parent/child relationships I Hate GSA Last edited by cap : 07-23-2008 at 08:44 AM.

09-08-2007, 06:54 PM	#8
cap Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Plymouth, MA Posts: 50	westermark effect I Hate GSA Last edited by cap : 07-23-2008 at 08:45 AM.

09-09-2007, 05:49 AM	#10
cap Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Plymouth, MA Posts: 50	I Hate GSA Last edited by cap : 07-23-2008 at 08:46 AM.

Thread Tools	Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Email this Page	Search this Thread: Advanced Search

08-30-2007, 08:12 PM	#2
Victor Super Moderator Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: USA Posts: 371	It's good to know that living with GSA can have a happy ending. Thanks for that. And thanks for letting your story go public. You have helped pave the way for others. My daughter and I are trying to follow your lead by telling ours. Again, thanks. Vic

09-07-2007, 07:40 AM	#3
luvsbubby Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: ohio Posts: 88	Victor Please be careful..there are some people who would rather see us burn in hell..it is twice as bad for parent/child. People have a different view when it comes to parent/child..and it is worse on this type of couple as you may have seen that on the abc site. People are always going to say the same thing to you and that is but you're the parent you should know better to them its about the traditional parent/child relationship, not about GSA, which is very hard for people to wrap their heads around. I want you to post your opinion(and support everything thats going on) but I dont think you should bring out your relationship right now. I just dont want to see you hurt or jailed. What we are doing is very dangerous right now. Until the laws change..we could get in serious trouble. All it takes is one journalist, law enforcement, or judge to see these issues and want a story that lasts for a few years in litigation to further their carreer. In the meantime we would be fighting for our freedom to love the person of our choice. Please be careful and send your daughter our thoughts, love and prayers. Luvsbubby

09-08-2007, 03:10 AM	#4
liltimetothink Junior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 15	Luvsbubby is right. When the situation concerns a parent/child situation, the parent will be looked at as having a better grip on the situation, and have enough sense to deter the situation from becoming a more intimate one. Brother/sister relationships are a more tolerant situation because society views the two participants on equal footing "so to speak". At least that's what I believe.

09-08-2007, 10:51 PM	#9
Victor Super Moderator Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: USA Posts: 371	Parents are already "grown up" so what then keeps them from being attracted to their children? I have two other daughters, who I raised, for whom I feel no such attraction. One of them looks verymuch like this one. So what's the difference? Why am I so attracted to the one but not the other? Westermarck. Spend enough time with someone in a non-sexual relationship and they become imprinted on your psyche as a non-sexual being. I have heard though that it takes about 6 years for the Westermarck effect to kick in. So it will probably take us six years of resisiting one another until our feelings finally subside. This is not, however, something you can do by separation. You have to live in close proximity to the person to effect the imprinting. Look, if it works it will be good news for those who suffer unrequited GSA, or those like me who just can't act on it or risk becoming the lowest scum on the planet. If not, I don't know what I'm going to do. But at least, right now, I'm trying to do something about it.